Sin and Religion

Religion should reconcile. However, the religion that emphasizes the bad appraisals to establish a negative self-image. Religion is simply understood and used as a form of punishment (to yourself and others) will only be destroyed.

A young girl sent this letter: "Mama's good, every morning to cook for me, working for the money to me. But it is also very easy to anger. As a kid I had to take a nap for fear of being punished. I do not dare to think of rattan-held duster accompany me mama any homework or studying. I have to be perfect and can answer all questions. I'm really slow thinking and sensitive to the bark.

When Mom snapped, I burst into tears. Mama will get angry because I was too mellow. In adolescence I was embarrassed by my appearance alone. I often disagree with mama, and it often ends with a shout-shout from mama. I'm sorry for my mama, who is very devoted to the father but treated roughly and humiliated, despised by the poor. I promised in my heart, a moment when I got married, I would like to invite my mom stayed with me. But each different opinions even mama says: "Do not know thank you! I would not want to stay with you, do not understand religion, rebellious child ...!'

I'm really innocent. Sin. Sin. Sin. Evil. Evil. Disobedience. I scold myself who disagree with Mom and stupid. I'm embarrassed, I was helpless. I remember shouts: 'Stupid! Feeling smart, but do not know anything! Damn! Dogs! Son of Satan! I'm sure, later on if you have a husband, he'll beat you! '. Mama said, though people always praise me but mama never been proud even know who I am ashamed because that does not really understand religion.

I want to go. But religion says I should not be faithless, should keep the parents. I told my brother, I want to boarding. He immediately shouted angry and threaten me, "If anything happens to my mom, all that is wrong with you!! Understand you?!! "Brak! The door was slammed.

I fail to go. Not able to imagine yourself feeling guilty letting my mom survived by a husband who never gave a dime since their marriage. I hope that religion helped me become more mature to accept the reality of life, feel more serene and peaceful. But until now, even I still hate myself, not to make peace with yourself. "

Personal life

If education in a home filled with insults and negative judgments, demands that are one-way, and not reciprocal, it is even possible to destroy religion. Differentiate with a more positive situation when parents give a concrete example, deliver praise when the child is well accepted, reprimand in positive language, not a double standard (simply sue other parties, but did not apply the rules for themselves).

In personal life and interpersonal relationships, the situation is very complex. Man has its own growth impulses: the need to have a positive self-image, would like to develop in accordance with the disposition of each unique, and motivated to protect themselves when treated badly by others.

On the other hand, we also want to be assessed positively by others, and try as much as possible conform to the judgments and expectations of others. As a result, often inner conflicts that sometimes settle in the long term is very painful. In the parent-child relationship, illustrated above can give a picture. Poor self-image and painful situation can also occur in a conjugal relationship and in other interpersonal relationships.

Social life

In social life, the situation is far more complex. If we are strong and beliefs contained by normative rules about how to perform religious rituals and behave the "right" and "should", we may appreciate the "big push" to ensure not only ourselves, but also other people to obey the normative rules them.

We want to make sure not only we who run the rule, but also others. We will use our moral standard to measure others, for messing-compartmentalize groups that exist in society, perhaps even forcing others to behave according to our view about the truth.

So then can happen to discrimination and violence on the other parties are considered bad in the name of faith or religious teaching. The situation is worse again when religious beliefs become politicized and exploited for the benefit of outside religions (eg, economic gain to sell product X, Y president won election in which a leader may be considered only men, or only people from religion Y).

Global Issues

The world today is full of problems; increasingly congested and narrow for occupancy, the more need of courage and "heart attitude" to compete and beat the other party. In such situations, fear and suspicion between groups can become increasingly sharp. As a result, discrimination and violence are also more prone to occur.

In one parallel session in Law and Punishment of the conference held at the University of Indonesia, Depok, 28 November-1 December 2010, presented by Prof. Dr. Marilyn Porter of Canada that the Canadian real friction-friction also occurs between groups. If minority groups in Indonesia (in the broad sense) as if being forced to become "equal" and should not be different, so also in Quebec, a province in Canada, which tends to homogeneous and filled with French-speaking Canadians. And the more vulnerable seems the same, namely women, whose behavior and how berbusananya set-set.

In Indonesia, Muslim women who did not rule the head may comment on "less religious". In Quebec, Muslim women who want to close the head may be ready to be discriminated against. So, the issue is not on religion or belief flow of X, Y, and Z, but on how people interpret. Is religion to be mere ideology to be exploited for their own interests, or the spirituality that really liberating, enlivening, and reconcile?